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Breaking the Shame Cycle: Transform Your Family Tree by Healing Past Traumas with Arletta Allen

Childhood trauma often leaves deep wounds, undermining self-worth and fostering shame that isolates victims from the community. To protect themselves, many retreat into silence and hide their true selves. This sets a cycle in motion where shame breeds more shame and isolation compounds loneliness. However, opening up about one’s journey with authenticity and compassion breaks this cycle and accelerates healing as individuals. 

Known as the “Authenticity Queen”, Arleta Allen serves as an international communications development coach and speaker. With her story of overcoming significant childhood trauma to find prosperity, Arletta now helps others overcome shame and self-sabotage, walking alongside them until they have a safe delivery of their dreams and visions into the world.

In this episode, Daniel and Arletta’s conversation revolves around how trauma impacts generations and the importance of vulnerability and authenticity in one’s healing journey. They also emphasize the power of shared experiences in breaking the cycle of shame and isolation, the need to face and overcome adversity to pursue one’s dreams, and the importance of self-belief, perseverance, and forgiveness in achieving success.

“You are a masterpiece because you are a piece of the Master— That makes you brilliant in every aspect.” —Arletta Allen

Episode Highlights
  • 02:14 Trauma and Self-Sabotage
  • 10:32 Sharing Your Story Helps Others Heal and Grow
  • 15:57 Good Fathers Validate Their Daughters 
  • 20:35 Healing Yourself Heals Your Family 
  • 26:31 Overcoming Adversity to Fulfill Your Purpose 
  • 33:44 Choose to be Chosen




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Connect with Arletta:

Arletta Allen is a powerhouse of resilience and transformation, serving as the CEO of Authentically Arletta Unlimited LLC. A Best-Selling Author, national award-winning professional speaker, workshop facilitator, Professional Speaking Coach/Trainer, TEDx Speaker, trauma recovery expert, and healing strategist, Arletta inspires and empowers individuals to overcome adversity and achieve their full potential.

Arletta’s academic journey showcases her dedication and excellence. Graduating Summa Cum Laude from Marian University, she holds a Bachelor’s in Communication (BOC) and Leadership Development Business degrees. Her professional acumen is further enhanced by certifications in Organizational Leadership, Healthcare Leadership, Principles of Leadership, and Human Resource Management.

A passionate advocate, Arletta champions numerous non-profit organizations across the nation. Her work with the National Community Action Partnerships and all Community Action Programs and Agencies demonstrates her commitment to sharing her personal story and experiences as a former client. Arletta also fervently supports TRIO/Upward Bound/SSS programs, providing a powerful voice for underrepresented and first-generation college students.

Arletta is a staunch advocate for sexual assault, domestic abuse, and mental health awareness. Her personal experiences and professional expertise make her a powerful voice in these areas, inspiring and guiding those affected towards healing and empowerment.

Through her speaking services, “Authentically Amplified,” Arletta has transformed countless clients, leading them to profound breakthroughs. Her unique approach and powerful delivery help individuals and organizations unlock their potential, achieve their goals, and experience lasting change.

Arletta’s literary contributions include the inspiring memoir “Defy the Odds: Making the Transition from Trauma to Triumph” and the “Gratitude Anthology: Who Influenced You? Three Relationships that Transformed My Life.” Her writings motivate and guide readers on their journeys from struggle to success. 


03:14 “So many people don’t realize how valuable their story is. They’re ashamed of it; they don’t talk about it.” —Daniel Gomez

03:43 “Love is the thing that solves everything in the world.” —Arletta Allen

04:49 “You are a masterpiece because you are a piece of the Master— That makes you brilliant in every aspect.” —Arletta Allen

06:33 “You’re easier to destroy if you keep yourself in hiding, if you keep yourself in shame, if you keep yourself away from the people you’ve been called to serve.” —Arletta Allen

11:14 “God needs to be the one that leads out on everything. Sometimes, life will be so heavy that you don’t have a choice but to go to your knees and throw your hands up in surrender… The victory is in the surrender.” —Arletta Allen

13:26 “You may be the only chapter somebody ever reads, and that one chapter will change and heal their life.” —Daniel Gomez

17:54 “Everybody has a time, and sometimes people try to force their time out prematurely. You have to go through much more before you can attain that level of expertise.” —Arletta Allen

23:38 “The thing with healing is that it’s an ongoing process.” —Arletta Allen

26:10 “If you’re going to defy the odds in every area of your life, you’ve got to be willing to believe in yourself. You got to be willing to forgive yourself.” —Arletta Allen

28:45 “There was not always going to be a cheerleading section. Sometimes, you needed to wake up and champion your own cause.” —Arletta Allen

29:53 “Forgiveness is not just for someone else but forgiveness is for you. Learn to treat yourself like someone you love.” —Arletta Allen

32:45 “If you don’t learn how to let go of the past, the past will define your future.” —Arletta Allen 

34:02 “We’re too hard on ourselves; we’re too negative sometimes and we wonder why our life isn’t the way it is.” —Daniel Gomez

35:04 “Are you going to be the one that is chosen? Choose to be the chosen.” —Daniel Gomez